Just Poems #15: Crawl vs. Rise
AI poem vs human poem. Also, they found a unreleased poetry collection from one of Finlands literacy geniuses, that has content adjacently related to human rights day.
Just Poem’s brings you poems in a timely and untimely fashion!
This exercise extrapolates the work started in the AI within Art project and builds upon the idea in the book Answers to Love, Life, and Leadership in an AI-Driven World.
The premise is to help people form opinions about written art created without the help of a computer vs. computer-generated written art.
Version 0.5 of the book only included poems written by humans. Version 1.0 is now available in PDF format by clicking the button below.
I picked up the following poem, “Crawl,” as the local newspaper featured an inspiring piece by a reporter who found and was allowed to read famed national author Mika Waltari’s letters to his mistress. Mika is internationally known for the best-seller Sinuhe, allegedly one of the best-written works in Finnish history.
When he was writing the book in 1945, he was in the middle of an affair, producing love letters and other text at a speed of 27 pages daily. The whole ordeal ended with a sleepless episode that sent him to a psychiatric ward and treated with a medically induced coma.
The discovery of these love letters this week has spurred quite a turmoil. Not only because his mistress donated the letters in 2004 on the premise they would only be opened at the earliest on 1.1.2024, meaning they’d sat there for almost a year without anyone looking at them, but the donation also included an unreleased manuscript: a sexual and sadistic poetry collection, unlike anything the literal world has seen before.
Now, this is not personally relatable due to the content of the poetry collection. I do not subscribe to any domestic violence, sexual and otherwise. Since Human Rights Day was celebrated this week, I’d like to highlight the campaign, “Life at the Ringside Documentary,” created by TB/WA and a former colleague.
We may never know whether Waltari enacted the things described in this newly found poetry collection, as it is simply an artist creating art. However, when has an artist not spun some truth into their art?
The fact that I condemn violence moved out of the way; I can relate to spending copious amounts of time writing and, in times of marital turmoil, producing some work that is better than other work. Additionally, my ordeals had me seek help from a psychiatric ward, and with the help of family and friends, I managed to get out of the hole I dug for myself. That story exists in the archives of the internet.
During that time, I wrote the following piece called “Crawl.”
Crawl
To follow your heart is a struggle The heart leads you towards the abyss A place your mind interprets as oblivion Your body will refuse to follow Your mind will turn on itself And all you can do is crawl Crawl day after day Crawl hour after hour Crawl minute after minute Until everything just gives in That's when you know you gave it everything you got, but it wasn't enough That's when you find the truth, because at the brink of exhaustion and lunacy nothing matters anymore. In oblivion nothing is real Except what your heart tells you is true. The truth in your heart still exists in oblivion, because love is born in a place in you that does not die.
As life doesn’t seem bleak anymore, let’s have Chat G-PoeT (my GPT) rewrite this for something more upbeat. Better yet, let’s follow the same structure and write the complete opposite in meaning, describing how you’ve gotten through it all and come out of it alive, better, and grateful. Here’s Chat G-PoeT’s un-edited output.
Rise
To follow your heart is a blessing, It guides you toward the light. A place your mind once feared as ruin, Your soul embraces as rebirth. Your body moves with purpose, Your mind aligns with peace. And all you can do is rise— Rise day after day, Rise hour after hour, Rise minute after minute, Until everything aligns and blooms. That’s when you know you gave it everything you had, and it was more than enough. That’s when you find the truth—because at the height of resilience and clarity, everything matters. In redemption, everything is real, Especially what your heart reveals. The truth in your heart thrives in redemption, Because love is born in a place in you that never fades.
What’s interesting here is the last phrase; it’s not contrarian to the original. They both still hold the same meaning, described in different words 🤔
Here are the poems in pictures by DALL-E
If you like this, want to support my writing work, or want more content to help you form an opinion about written art, consider buying the PDF version of my poetry collection, Answers to Love, Life, and Leadership in an AI-Driven World by clicking the button below
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