Just Poems #8: The Window to the soul vs. Eyes of Time
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This exercise extrapolates the work started in the AI within Art project and builds upon the idea in the book Answers to Love, Life, and Leadership in an AI-driven World. Version 0.5 of the book only included poems written by a human.
I looked through the random archives for poems to salvage and found this unpolished gem that didn’t need much work to be released.
Background thoughts and notions: It was written during an orange sunset, and the second date ended with a double rainbow. People talk to me and forget my age. There are only a few people with whom I’ve held a gaze. Most people don’t know what love feels like and mistake it for lust. Both are pleasant feelings, but relationships are forged and ended when pursuing the wrong feeling.
The window to the soul
Viewing beautiful sunsets with red-orange skies.
Watching double rainbows while saying your goodbyes.
But nothing compares to being lost in someone elses eyes.
They say the right eye is the window to one’s soul. Look at mine; you’ll see it’s already grey and old. It carries the burden of a story that takes a lifetime to unfold.
However, if you look closely enough, you’ll see no dust, just a flame that makes iron out of rust. A spirit that knows the difference between love and lust.
Here’s Chat G PoeT prompted to produce something that captures the notion better than what I did;
Eyes of Time
Beneath the orange sky, where the sun dips low, and rainbows dance as if to bid goodbye's glow. There lies a truth, more subtle yet profound, in the silent moments where no words are found.
For gazing deep into another's stare, a world unfolds, unguarded, raw, and bare. The eyes, they say, reflect what’s felt inside, a soul that’s lived, though time may try to hide.
Mine, weathered by the years, a silver hue, but still, a flame burns fierce and bright for you. It knows the difference—love, not lust, is key—where bonds are built, and passion’s truly free.
So look, and see the story still untold—a heart that’s warm, though carried by the old.
The first paragraph is good. The second line in the second paragraph tries to bring contrast, but it doesn’t really make sense. The third paragraph is too complicated. The last ending ends on a weird note. I will scratch everything except the first paragraph of the first line and prompt more straightforward wording.
Eyes of Time 2.0
Beneath the orange sky, where the sun dips low, and rainbows dance as if to bid goodbye's glow. There lies a truth, more subtle yet profound, in the silent moments where no words are found.
For when two souls meet in a gaze so still, they share a spark no passing time can kill. Through ancient eyes, where love and life collide, a bond is formed that nothing can divide.
Brilliant, it makes much more sense. “Through ancient eyes” feels wrong; otherwise, it’s perfect. It should be something like “Through newborn eyes,” but we’ll stick with ancient as it better reflects the title.
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